Interesting Signposts one could come across

Name of a shop in Bangkok: Cabbages and Condoms (Never could figure out the connection.... Damn Thighs .. oops Thais)

Liquor shop in Delhi displaying: Child Bear :-O (meaning chilled beer)

A Maruti 800 (in case of the ill-informed ... a basic 800 cc car) with the following sticker: ROCAM (Rotating Overhead Cam), MPFI (Multi-point fuel-injection)

Or a highway restaurant (also called "dhaba") advertising "Authentic Chinees" food

The most popular car in Delhi "Mruti Steam" (Maruti Esteem in case you are wondering)

I observed this sign on many delhi bus-stops ... "Lajpat Rai Xing", "MG road Xing".... and it took me a while to figure out that Xing = Cross-ing :) (I know the guns are out on my I.Q :)

"Shaadi rok di jaaye" (should marriage be held up?) is very popular on roadside banners in small towns -- put up by hakims (fraud medical practitioners) to address ailments/lack of functionality of a sexual nature :))

Menu card description in a Lucknow hotel: After eat, you will fall to love in the Chef (After having savoured this dish, you'd fall in love with our chef! -- Aside: Which in itself was scary considering the "chef"... he was more of a halwaai)

-- More additions as we go along !!

Protsaaa!* Blast’in Bangkok

First up … on the “thigh” airways .. (oops … is that ‘thai’ :) flight to Bang-kok … there was this veritable crowd of very stern looking characters … I learnt later … that these men were simply determined to have a “good time” (pun intended)… as I bumped into quite a few of them @ all the interesting places … J …

(CLARIFICATION: I had to make these trips for reporting purposes)

Anyways … @ the immigration counter there was this guy who walked in with his girlfriend and pat came the comment from a smart alec next to me … “restaurant mein paraanthe lekar aaya hai” … (which roughly translated means … who the hell goes to a restaurant carrying bread along ;-)….

Bangkok is a city of excesses …. Especially in one particular skill … beyond 9 ‘o clock in the evening, the city just transforms …. Walk the streets and you would feel that you are some kinda Tom Cruise … coz every other gal would be falling on you … J .. As long as you remain with the Tom Cruise persona .. its OK … but once you try to become someone like “Pat Thunder” or “James Humper” … (if you don’t know who they are … well lemme tell ya! Even I have no clue … but usually porn “stars” have such outrageous names) itz an entirely different ballgame …

If is fascinating to see balding old white men with big beer bellies lugging along petite, young arm candy …

Oh! Did I tell you about the time a buddy of mine was accosted by an airline ‘stewardess’ crew in the lift ;-) … (Well! lemme save something for later)

The good things about Bangkok –

(1) The people are very friendly and service-oriented .. so the service in hotels and restaurants is amazing … there are some places though where this rule doesn’t quite hold.

(2) If you are a seafood freak … this is the place to be .. but be sure to carry some antacids etc. coz you would tend to overdo it ..

(3) They have good infrastructure … roads, expressways, subways, skybus, tuk-tuks, cabs … the works .. the only problem … to and from downtown to anywhere during peak traffic hours is a nightmare …

(4) Some people really find their fun selves here … they let their hair down and go along with the electricity …

(5) Last but not the least … great massages :)

My feelings on the flight back from Bangkok – how the hell did the time pass so soon … Gotta get back here soon to regain my sanity whenever things aren’t quite going my way :)

(NOTE: “Protsaaa” is thai for ‘attention please’)

Five Pharaohs went camping

It was last weekend when me and my buddies decided to go camping ... After considerable discussions and innumerable rounds of ayes and naehs ... me and another chappie browbeat the others to tag along ...

The weather was fickle ... it was raining off and on ... there was news of an outbreak of celebral malaria in the vicinity of our camping location ... The river was raging (the Cauvery flows right next to our camping spot ... rather ... we camp right next to where the Cauvery flows :)

The argument against 'celebral malaria' was that since most of us didnt have a cerebrum or a cerebellum ... (essentially a brain ... CM wont affect us :)

So we packed up the essentials:
1) Booze ..
2) Booze ...
3) Some more booze
4) Coupla guitars and the guitarists ... :))
5) Tent ... folding camp equip ...
6) Odomos ..
7) Food
8) Undies
9) Booze ...

Once out we were braving the weather and the rains .. To make things more exciting .. we packaged it as a 'pharaoh tour of the wilderness' ...

So there was the musical purist who would expound the theoretical aspects of music in a "Comfortably Numb" number .... --> Pathetic II

The biggest, strongest guy ... who was most scared of mosquitoes ... and sounded like but a puppy when his girlfriend gave him a dressing down on the phone ... (We rechristened him sweety which irked him no end :) --> Nemesys III

The cool guy who gets high and hits the roof after a coupla swigs of beer ... red capri pants, blue and yellow striped sports vest ... yeah! hez from the land of "Rajnikant" --> Clumsys II

And yours truly (also known as "Cheetah" in this group) who would constantly take jabs at all the poor souls ... and whose sole purpose in life is to find a scapegoat to crack a joke or two at ... --> Bastard I :))

{rechristened by an especially enraged Pathetic II}

And how can I forget the only pharaoh who ate less and drank more ... (no exhaggeration ...) who is frequently mistaken for a hot chick from behind ... considering his long locks ... lead guitarist par excellence ... --> Dimwits IV

All in all it was an amazing trip .... with the rains off and on .. the raging river, the now-off-now-revived bonfire ... some full throated renditions of Floyd, Metallica, Beatles ... and a few hindi numbers ...

When thousands of years from now ... this camping site gets excavated ... they would find rock art ... of 5 pharaohs ... and 2 queens (ultra-finicky and almost-perfecti)

More on other adventures later :)) ...